It’s wild how quickly a stranger’s mood can latch onto yours.
A rude comment, an aggressive driver, or just someone with tense, heavy energy—you don’t even know them, but suddenly, you’re carrying their weight. It’s frustrating because logically, you know they shouldn’t have that much power. But emotionally? It sticks. Here’s how to shake off that negative energy before it settles in deeper than it should.
1. Don’t take the bait.
When someone’s being unnecessarily rude or short with you, the urge to fire back is strong. However, jumping into their energy is exactly how it lingers. The more reactive you are, the more entangled you become in something that was never yours to begin with.
Choosing not to engage doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’re choosing peace over proving a point to someone who might just be projecting their bad day onto whoever’s closest. Let them keep it—you don’t need to carry it.
2. Remind yourself it’s not personal.
We’re wired to make things about us. If someone sighs near us or snaps a reply, our brains assume, “What did I do?” However, most of the time, it has absolutely nothing to do with you. You just happened to be in the blast zone. Reminding yourself that people carry invisible burdens can help you release the need to internalise their behaviour. It’s not about excusing it—it’s about freeing yourself from the false belief that you caused it.
3. Use a physical reset.
When someone’s negative energy hits hard, it can land in your body. Your jaw clenches, your shoulders rise, your breath gets shallow. One way to stop it from sinking in deeper is to physically move it out. Shake out your hands. Stretch your arms. Take three deep breaths and roll your shoulders. It sounds simple, but it’s a way of saying, “That energy’s not welcome here,” and showing your nervous system it can calm down now.
4. Label it out loud (if you can).
Putting words to what just happened can help unhook it from your mind. Saying, “That felt weird,” or “That energy wasn’t mine,” reminds your brain to let it go instead of looping on it all day. You don’t have to launch into a rant—just name it enough to create distance. The more you can treat it like a passing cloud instead of a storm that belongs to you, the easier it becomes to move on.
5. Use humour to break the spell.
A little humour can instantly take the sting out of someone else’s bad vibe. It’s not about mocking them—it’s about protecting your peace. If you can internally say, “Wow, someone forgot their morning coffee,” it helps you disconnect from the heaviness. Humour lightens things. It reminds you that other people’s moods aren’t sacred truths. They’re just energy passing through. You don’t have to absorb it like it’s gospel.
6. Visualise it leaving.
If you’re a visual thinker, picture their bad energy like smoke or static clinging to your clothes. Now picture brushing it off. Literally swipe your arms or shake your hands out and imagine that tension falling away. This might sound a bit woo-woo, but the brain responds strongly to imagery. Giving your mind something physical to “release” helps reinforce the message that you’re not holding onto their vibe any longer.
7. Don’t overanalyse it if you can help it.
After a weird encounter, it’s easy to replay it like a film you didn’t ask to star in. However, the more you examine their face, their tone, or what they might have meant, the more space it takes up in your mind. You don’t need to solve it. You don’t need to figure them out. People are complicated, and sometimes their energy is just messy. Let it stay their mystery—you don’t need to carry it home like emotional clutter.
8. Redirect your attention.
Energy follows focus. If someone drains you, the fastest way to stop the leak is to redirect your focus to something neutral or comforting. Your surroundings. A task. A bit of music. Anything that gently changes your internal state. You don’t need to pretend it didn’t happen—it’s about choosing where to park your attention next. The longer you stare at the spill, the more you soak it up. So move on, even if just mentally.
9. Protect your space energetically.
We talk a lot about boundaries with people we know, but it applies to strangers too. Just because someone’s near you doesn’t mean they’re entitled to your emotional energy. Mentally draw a line if you need to. Imagine a little force field or bubble around you. You’re still present, still kind, but their storm doesn’t get to soak you. This kind of mental boundary-building takes practice, but it seriously helps when dealing with draining strangers.
10. Let music clear the air.
If you walk away from an encounter still carrying it, try putting on music that feels completely opposite to the energy you just absorbed. Something playful, gentle, or grounding can instantly change your emotional tone. It works because music bypasses logic and hits straight at your emotional frequency. One good song can override a bad moment in ways words sometimes can’t. Think of it as an emotional palate cleanser.
11. Practise compassion—then walk away.
Sometimes it helps to remind yourself, “That person might be going through something awful.” A bit of compassion can soften the edge of anger or defensiveness and make it easier to let go. However, don’t confuse compassion with obligation. You can send a silent “hope they’re okay” into the world and still remove yourself from their energy. You don’t need to stay in the room to wish someone well.
12. Say something kind to yourself.
After dealing with someone else’s mess, your self-talk matters more than ever. Instead of letting their energy sink in and change your mood, say something simple and reassuring to yourself like, “I handled that well,” or “That wasn’t mine to fix.” You’re re-establishing who you are after someone else’s storm. A gentle phrase like that can anchor you back into your own lane, where you don’t need to carry what doesn’t belong to you.
13. Don’t let it make you smaller.
Negative energy can make you shrink without realising it—hunch your shoulders, avoid eye contact, walk away second-guessing yourself. But the antidote is to consciously hold your space. Breathe deeper. Stand up straighter. It’s a way of telling your body, “I’m still safe. I’m still me.” When you physically take up space again, it tells your mind that someone else’s mood didn’t get to define your whole day.
14. Remind yourself that energy is contagious, but so is calm.
We absorb bad energy easily, but we forget that we can also pass on calm, kindness, or lightness just as quickly. You don’t have to meet negativity with more of it—you can choose to stay rooted in your own energy. This reminder puts you back in charge. You’re not just reacting—you’re choosing. And the more you practice staying in your own lane, the easier it gets to let the rest float on by.
