Change has a sneaky way of showing up just when you’re starting to feel comfortable.
Whether it’s a new job, the end of a relationship, a house move, or even something as small as a change in routine—it can throw everything off balance. And while some people seem to breeze through big transitions, the rest of us are just trying not to lose our footing. However, getting overwhelmed doesn’t have to be your default. There are practical, gentle ways to move through change without it completely upending you. Here’s how to navigate it when everything feels a bit much.
1. Acknowledge that change is hard, even if it’s good.
We tend to feel guilty when we struggle with positive change—like starting a new job or moving into a nicer place—because it’s “meant” to feel exciting. But the truth is, even good change disrupts our sense of normal. There’s unfamiliarity, pressure to adjust quickly, and sometimes, a quiet sense of loss for what we’ve left behind.
Letting yourself admit that it’s hard without needing to justify it can be surprisingly relieving. You don’t have to be thrilled about every part of the process. Naming the discomfort takes the pressure off pretending everything’s fine when it’s actually just new and messy.
2. Don’t expect yourself to adapt overnight.
We love a quick fix, but emotional adjustment doesn’t follow a set schedule. Your brain needs time to catch up to new circumstances, especially if they’ve disrupted your routine, identity, or sense of safety. The idea that you should just “get on with it” often leads to guilt and frustration.
Instead, treat change like something you ease into. Give yourself grace in the early days. Lower your expectations where you can, and remind yourself that getting used to something new takes repetition, not pressure. Adapting is a process, not a performance.
3. Keep something familiar in your routine.
When everything around you is changing, it helps to hold on to one small habit that feels familiar. Whether it’s making your morning coffee the same way or watching a comfort show before bed, having an anchor can give your brain a sense of continuity.
These little rituals don’t just offer comfort—they remind you that some things are still stable. In times of change, even a 10-minute walk at the same time each day can provide a feeling of control and rhythm that calms your nervous system.
4. Talk about it, even if you don’t have answers.
You don’t need to have everything figured out to start a conversation. Just talking to someone about how weird, disorienting, or even exciting the change feels can stop you from spiralling alone in your own thoughts. Naming your emotions out loud often reduces their intensity. Sometimes it’s not advice you need—it’s simply a bit of validation or a reminder that you’re not the only one struggling with transitions. Sharing the load, even briefly, makes it feel lighter to carry.
5. Break big changes into smaller tasks.
When you’re dealing with a major life change, it’s easy to get overwhelmed by the sheer scale of it. The trick is to stop looking at the entire mountain and just focus on the next step. What’s one tiny thing you can do today that supports the bigger picture?
Breaking change into bite-sized bits makes it more manageable, and it gives you quick wins that boost confidence along the way. Whether it’s updating one document, making one call, or packing one box, progress is still progress.
6. Be mindful of how you’re talking to yourself.
In the thick of change, your inner dialogue can either build you up or completely wreck your confidence. If you’re constantly telling yourself you’re not handling it well, or that you should be doing better, it just adds more stress to an already shaky time.
Try to notice when your self-talk turns harsh. Then gently reframe it—something like, “I’m doing the best I can right now” or “It’s okay not to have it all together.” These small changes in language can have a big impact on how capable you feel.
7. Let yourself grieve what you’re leaving behind.
Change almost always involves some kind of loss, even if it’s just the comfort of how things used to be. Maybe you’re leaving a familiar job, moving away from a favourite café, or ending a version of your identity that felt secure. Grieving isn’t dramatic or self-indulgent—it’s honest. Let yourself miss what’s gone without rushing to replace it. The space between what was and what’s coming next deserves to be honoured, not skipped over.
8. Don’t confuse discomfort with danger.
Change feels uncomfortable. That’s normal, but your brain might interpret that discomfort as a sign that something’s wrong—like you’re failing or unsafe. It’s important to separate those feelings. Discomfort doesn’t mean you’ve made a mistake. It just means you’re growing.
The more you sit with the weirdness of change without panicking, the more resilient you become. You start to realise that you can handle things feeling off for a while, and that they’ll eventually settle into something new and manageable.
9. Set smaller, more realistic expectations.
Big life changes can come with unrealistic pressure to “bounce back” quickly or be wildly productive right away. However, you’re not a machine—you’re a person figuring things out in real time. Give yourself a more forgiving checklist for this chapter. Instead of trying to stay at your usual pace, flip your focus to things like: Did I take care of myself today? Did I handle one new thing? That’s enough. Being kind to yourself is far more effective than constantly pushing.
10. Get curious, not critical.
When change hits, we often go into “fix it” or “figure it out” mode. However, not every change needs a solution straight away. Sometimes, what helps more is curiosity—asking yourself questions instead of judging yourself for not having answers. What’s feeling hardest right now? What’s surprised me about this transition?
These kinds of questions help you process rather than panic. Plus, curiosity keeps your mind open, which is exactly what you need when everything feels unfamiliar.
11. Focus on what’s in your control.
One of the hardest parts of change is how out of control it can feel. But even in the chaos, there are always things you can influence—how you respond, how you care for yourself, and what you choose to prioritise next.
Instead of trying to manage everything, pick a few small areas where your actions genuinely make a difference. That might be your daily routine, how you talk to other people, or how you manage your downtime. Control isn’t about having power over the situation—it’s about owning your part in it.
12. Let go of the idea that change needs to feel good to be right.
Sometimes we think we’ve made a bad decision simply because it feels hard. However, change—even necessary, positive change—can feel uncomfortable for a long time. That doesn’t mean it’s wrong. It just means you’re human, adjusting. Don’t judge the process too soon. If things feel awkward, painful, or uncertain, that’s not failure—it’s transition. Give the new version of your life a chance to find its rhythm before deciding whether it fits.
13. Find one person who gets it.
You don’t need a crowd of cheerleaders—just one person who listens without fixing, who lets you vent or ramble or cry if needed. When change feels overwhelming, that one person can be your emotional anchor. Look for someone who doesn’t rush to say “you’ll be fine,” but instead says “I get it—it’s tough.” That kind of presence is powerful. It reminds you that you’re not navigating this alone, even if it feels that way sometimes.
14. Remind yourself that you’ve handled change before.
This isn’t your first life transition, and it won’t be your last. You’ve adapted to things before, even when it didn’t feel possible at the time. Looking back on those moments can be grounding. They’re proof that you’re more adaptable than you give yourself credit for.
Keep that history close. The skills you used before—resilience, patience, flexibility—they’re all still in you. This change might look different, but you’ve got the tools to meet it. You’re allowed to feel overwhelmed and still move forward anyway.
